Use an apply-templates with a select
<xsl:template match="datenFuerKunden"> <!-- Didn't need the a: -->
<Kunde>
<name>
<xsl:value-of select="nachname"/>
</name>
<xsl:variable name="kId" select="@kundenID"/>
<xsl:apply-templates select="//datenFuerRechnung[@kundenID=$kId]"/>
</Kunde>
</xsl:template>
<xsl:template match="datenFuerRechnung">
<Nr>
<xsl:value-of select="nummer"/>
</Nr>
</xsl:template>